Tony's Talents

Bungee Jumping -- Tony loves taking the end of the window blinds' strings in his mouth and climbing onto the tall headboard of Kalyn's bed. He rarely intends to jump from that height, but he's not good at walking on a narrow ledge, especially once the string tightens. So he falls and just hangs in the air, refusing to let go of the string.

Playing the Piano -- Tony is fascinated by the piano. He stands like a prairie dog in the chair in the front of the piano, and he plays the keys with his two front paws. He likes hitting only one note at a time. It bothers him when he hits a bad chords. He especially likes playing piano in the middle of the night.

Telling Us the Weather -- When rain is coming, Tony goes crazy. His tail puffs up and he runs frantically throughout the house attacking anything that moves and jumping into stuff. And you know either that the rain is coming or that it is currently raining. The only problem with this is that Tony has a random habit of doing this at times when he's just in the mood to do this, which means he's not entirely reliable.

Singing -- Tony is the most talkative cat I've ever seen. If you open a window, he'll sit there and talk to the outside world all afternoon. If you're doing something that needs quiet, you have to shut the door so that you don't hear him. He won't shut up.

Taking Baths -- This is usually not anything special for cats. They clean constantly. But Tony's a little different. He loves water. We noticed this pretty early. Other cats we've had could be trained, for instance to stay off of the table, by spraying them with water. Spraying Tony, however, never bothered him. So now, when we're doing the dishes, he tries to get up on the counter and get in the water. When you flush the comode, he attacks the disappearing water. He sleeps in the bathroom sink at night. Thankfully, he's still scared of the sound of water hitting the shower curtain, but as soon as you leave the bathroom after a shower, he goes and jumps into the shower to play in the draining water.

Playing Fetch -- Tony actually plays fetch. He has a little jingly ball that we throw. He runs and uses his paw to maneuver the little grooves in it around until he can get his teeth around them. Then, he carries the ball back to us to throw again. Tony is a cat that plays fetch.

Running in Place -- Tony love all smooth surfaces, especially mirrors, windows, and the sides of the washing machine. He will stand in front of one of these objects for hours and just act like he's trying to quickly climb up it, though of course, he's just standing in place.

Beating Up Dogs -- Kalyn's fiance has a large labrador who is way too nice. The poor thing is scared to death of Tony whenever they're around one another. The reason for this is that Tony incessently attacks the dog whenever that's something like ten times his size. The sweet dog is so shocked, she doesn't know what to do.

Typing -- Tony likes the clicking of keyboards, and so if you walk away from the computer, you may come back to find that Tony has been typing for you. This was especially fun back when I was grading to try to fix his mistakes. He's not a very good speller. All of the stupid posts on my blog were actually done by Tony when I was away from the apartment.

Contemplating Metaphysics -- Tony gazes incessently at the ceiling. If you hold him up high enough that he can reach it, he attacks it. I'm not sure exactly why he hated the ceiling so much, but I have some ideas. I made the mistake of leaving my copy of Thus Spake Zarathustra on the bottom shelf of bookshelf. I'm pretty sure that Tony read it, and it has shaped his philosophical mindset. He now envisions himself as an "Overkitten" who is attempting to extert his will and destroy all of those things that are keeping him from attaining utter existential freedom. The things he wants to destroy, in particular, are me, my sister, and this apartment. I'm sure the ceiling represents God to him, and hence, he wants to annihilate it. Thankfully, we have the vaccuum cleaner to keep Tony in check.