So, I went to the post office last Friday, and I asked for a book of stamps from the man that was working there.

He handed me a book of stamps with flags on it.

This was sort of unfortunate. You see, I was needing those stamps to send off scholarship stuff and job applications to several universities. Professors in my departments are, not always, but often, a little unpatriotic. So, I didn't want to have a patriotic stamp on the envelope. It was a pretty minor thing, but it could only hurt my chances for the job or scholarship.

So, I asked very nicely if I could possibly have a different book of stamps.

And he told me, gruffly, "Who's ever heard of somebody not wanting flag stamps? What are you, a communist? You oughta' move to Iran. I hear they're looking for people like you."

I said, "I'll take the stamps with the dove on it."