Oh Happy Day!!!!!!!

I've always thought that once you're assigned a holiday, that just means that all the other days aren't your days. I may be wrong, but anyway, I guess you should do the best with what you got.

Which is, of course, why today is such an awesome day for me!!!!!!!! No, August 13th hasn't yet been named John Carol Pierce, Jr. Day (if that prospect ever arises, I'd prefer that holiday to be in October around my birthday). Today is LEFT HANDERS DAY!!!!!!!

We poor lefties really do need a day. After all, we put up with being discriminated against constantly. Just think about it; all kinds of things from our ink pens and scissors to our power tools to our cars and highways are right-handed. Our teachers and coaches don't know how to handle us. We left handed people even have shorter life spans than righties. (My theory for this: deaths cause by road rage from people who hate our tendency to drive in the left lane.) Christianity even seems to have something against us (Christ sitting on God's right hand, people on Christ's left going to Hell in Matt 25, etc.).

Plus, we're soooooo wonderful. If you ignore the couple of odd ducks like Napoleon, Richard Simmons, and Celine Dion, there are some pretty cool left handers out there like ol' Leonardo Da Vinci, Michaelangelo, Lewis Carroll, Douglas Adams, Charlie Chaplin, Mozart, Jimmy Hendricks, Babe Ruth, and me.

So anyway, for all you righties out there, if you have some left-handed friends, this is the day to throw them a party or lavish them with gifts or give them a party or something. You can go back to torturing us tomorrow. :-)